Right now I am involved in an online bible study through Proverbs 31 ministries. I am really glad I found this because it’s the end of summer and not many churches including my own have studies going on right now. They usually start after Labor Day weekend. I wanted to do a study though and since I already had the book: “What Happens When Women Say Yes To God” By Lysa TerKeurst, I figured why not? It was weird not to have people to gather with in person, but there is this amazing online support where we all gather together like we would at someone house or church. I enjoy the leader’s little daily videos and updates and how they give us an informal daily task to help me stay track.
Lately, though I’ve been falling behind. I completely missed a chapter and looking back I wonder what exactly distracted me so much to miss a whole week? There were a few moments where I wanted to throw in the towel. I’m too busy with work, stressing out about whether or not I earned full time, attempting to prove myself with going the extra mile the last week before we shut down to clean, or just being lazy. That was probably it, I was being lazy. I was spending my “down time” on browsing the Internet, watching TV, or just sitting around.
When I think about the weeks when I did the study to the best I could I realized that I heard God’s voice more throughout my day, that I tried harder to see God in my work day and beyond. I dealt with stressors better, being slow to react with an emotional outburst and being able to deal with it in a calm matter. I mean it wasn’t always the case but more times than not it was. I think carving out time for God in the morning and before bed really does make a difference in how I react to the worldly things. I think it keeps me focus on what’s important and how to react. How taking a quiet walk during my lunch break, praying for my coworkers, students and parents, lifting up any worries I had for the day, really did help me be a better instructor and person.
I am glad that I didn’t just stop doing the study but continued it because I am really seeing how it has been benefitting my life and possibly others. I hope and pray that I remember this down the line if I ever feel like I can’t do this anymore esp. when I start full time on Tuesday!!!!!!!